My name is Emily, but it’s actually not my legal name. My legal name is Yu Fan. It is different than usual Canadian names because I was born in China. My mom was an accountant, and my dad was an engineer, and I went to ballet lessons 4 times a week. The May after my fifth birthday, my parents decided that they wanted to immigrant to Canada. It was quite a change when we finally got here after signing papers, hauling our heavy luggage, and a painful eleven hour flight.It was much less crowded here and there were trees everywhere! I adjusted and picked up the new language pretty fast (or so my mom says), and the summer before I started kindergarten, my mom signed me up for swimming lessons. I loved the feeling of the clear water holding me up and the easy movement of moving through it. I still do now, and that’s why I am a competitive swimmer. I love it when just before my race; I can feel the excitement and longing to get in the water, to try to out touch everyone at the finish wall. Of course after the races, I say good job to everyone that I raced because I think it is import to say those things. Encouragement and honestly really motivates people, especially me. There are some other things that are really important to me like my family, my friends, and being honest to myself. For example; I really like to read, and I do so a lot, but I make sure that I don’t read so much, that I ignore my friends and family. I read a lot of fiction novels. My favourites are by Sarah Dessen, and all of them have happy endings, but sometimes I have to be honest and remind myself that not every story has a happy ending. Hopefully my story will end with one because I am a very determined person. When things don’t go right for me, I keep on trying, or find a different route and make a different approach. I mean, I fell off my bike so many times, that I have scars all over my knees, but the important thing is that I got back on every single time, and eventually learned to ride. To me, it’s really not the outcome; it’s the process of how you get there.
Thanks for all your information. Be sure to carefully proofread for syntax errors and run-on sentences. A semi colon may only be used to separate two independent clauses (complete sentences). You nailed it on the last sentence. 5/6
Paragraph About Myself :)
My name is Emily, but it’s actually not my legal name. My legal name is Yu Fan. It is different than usual Canadian names because I was born in China. My mom was an accountant, and my dad was an engineer, and I went to ballet lessons 4 times a week. The May after my fifth birthday, my parents decided that they wanted to immigrant to Canada. It was quite a change when we finally got here after signing papers, hauling our heavy luggage, and a painful eleven hour flight. It was much less crowded here and there were trees everywhere! I adjusted and picked up the new language pretty fast (or so my mom says), and the summer before I started kindergarten, my mom signed me up for swimming lessons. I loved the feeling of the clear water holding me up and the easy movement of moving through it. I still do now, and that’s why I am a competitive swimmer. I love it when just before my race; I can feel the excitement and longing to get in the water, to try to out touch everyone at the finish wall. Of course after the races, I say good job to everyone that I raced because I think it is import to say those things. Encouragement and honestly really motivates people, especially me. There are some other things that are really important to me like my family, my friends, and being honest to myself. For example; I really like to read, and I do so a lot, but I make sure that I don’t read so much, that I ignore my friends and family. I read a lot of fiction novels. My favourites are by Sarah Dessen, and all of them have happy endings, but sometimes I have to be honest and remind myself that not every story has a happy ending. Hopefully my story will end with one because I am a very determined person. When things don’t go right for me, I keep on trying, or find a different route and make a different approach. I mean, I fell off my bike so many times, that I have scars all over my knees, but the important thing is that I got back on every single time, and eventually learned to ride. To me, it’s really not the outcome; it’s the process of how you get there.Thanks for all your information. Be sure to carefully proofread for syntax errors and run-on sentences. A semi colon may only be used to separate two independent clauses (complete sentences). You nailed it on the last sentence.
5/6